Feelings....I like him...I like him not...
There was a point when I liked him.. then I liked him as a close friend...we're getting along pretty well like that..then friday ..he just looked so cute and I liked him all over again...
A overwhelming urge came over me to take the phone and sms him that I liked him came over me... I was just ithching...but I calmed myself down and didn't do it...
Arrrrggghhhhh.....he's just the perfect one..but he dosen't like like anyone ....
Stupid me...just so dumb....
Okay gonna calm down now... dun't know wat to do...
Saturday, April 4, 2009
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Wow....
Holy Smokeroons... it's scary how your circle of single friends gets smaller and smaller...I choose my friends and I must say they are the best in the world.
I have groups of friends from primary, sec, lasalle and work. My bestees are sec. Indians girls...but we;re not your average or typical kind...we have goals and aspirations and push each other to pursue and even push each other to the right path and to me tat sure dang make a whole lotta difference.
I will take it from my earlier post about marraiges and how quickly they are happening...and out of the 5 Indian girl grp...I'm the last one standing...well actually there;s 2 of us...but the other can get a guy pretty quickly, coz she's drop dead hot..yikes...pressures on mates...
I'm not thin, or good looking or even girly, I can be insane and loud, i think tat could be one reason..and the one tat I like..well you know the story....
So I called my bestee after 3 days of her smsin me about how she finally told her mum about her boyfriend...turns out she's gonna get engaged and has to by this MAY!!! hahahhahahah...I couldn;t believe I was hearing those words from her, coz she was not that girly girly hahah... well i;m definitely helping her out and am wishing her my best and we;re all happy for her..
Another very pregnant bestee called me over to her place for some catching up with a really really long lost friend..and tat girl is bringing her 2 kids along...omg... plus another bestee who just got engaged is bringing her hubby along..she invited me and said I had to come....I really dun wanna go...I mean I just feel so outta place rite now...
Everyone has someone and for the longest time i kept thinking well live my life first...but now tat i;m 26...i;m not too sure about many things anymore... but one things for sure...these bunch of monkeys, ladies, SISTERs I have and will always cherish...have never changed their attitude or character and I really respect and admire that in all of them...You rock ladies!!!
I have groups of friends from primary, sec, lasalle and work. My bestees are sec. Indians girls...but we;re not your average or typical kind...we have goals and aspirations and push each other to pursue and even push each other to the right path and to me tat sure dang make a whole lotta difference.
I will take it from my earlier post about marraiges and how quickly they are happening...and out of the 5 Indian girl grp...I'm the last one standing...well actually there;s 2 of us...but the other can get a guy pretty quickly, coz she's drop dead hot..yikes...pressures on mates...
I'm not thin, or good looking or even girly, I can be insane and loud, i think tat could be one reason..and the one tat I like..well you know the story....
So I called my bestee after 3 days of her smsin me about how she finally told her mum about her boyfriend...turns out she's gonna get engaged and has to by this MAY!!! hahahhahahah...I couldn;t believe I was hearing those words from her, coz she was not that girly girly hahah... well i;m definitely helping her out and am wishing her my best and we;re all happy for her..
Another very pregnant bestee called me over to her place for some catching up with a really really long lost friend..and tat girl is bringing her 2 kids along...omg... plus another bestee who just got engaged is bringing her hubby along..she invited me and said I had to come....I really dun wanna go...I mean I just feel so outta place rite now...
Everyone has someone and for the longest time i kept thinking well live my life first...but now tat i;m 26...i;m not too sure about many things anymore... but one things for sure...these bunch of monkeys, ladies, SISTERs I have and will always cherish...have never changed their attitude or character and I really respect and admire that in all of them...You rock ladies!!!
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
The Shame
Have you ever felt the need to just scream at the one person who is also a good friend, and you don't know how. Well that's how I feel.
I also feel that sometimes I talk too much and that might be just over-confidence and just someone to show you a face of a stupid remark you made (too much talk) could just burst that confidence bubble and make you start thkinking of all the negative aspects that is currently happening in my life.
It sure as hell sucks...it's almost as if I had schizophrenia...once moment I was a smiling and all happy and the next quiet and moody. It scares me, and I thought i had that figured out...shame on me.
I still feel like crap, I guess it's another phase in life, why can't it be as smooth as always...grrrrrrrrrr
I also feel that sometimes I talk too much and that might be just over-confidence and just someone to show you a face of a stupid remark you made (too much talk) could just burst that confidence bubble and make you start thkinking of all the negative aspects that is currently happening in my life.
It sure as hell sucks...it's almost as if I had schizophrenia...once moment I was a smiling and all happy and the next quiet and moody. It scares me, and I thought i had that figured out...shame on me.
I still feel like crap, I guess it's another phase in life, why can't it be as smooth as always...grrrrrrrrrr
Saturday, February 14, 2009
Satisfaction...A feeling
The feeling of satisfaction does not come when you want it too it just comes when you least expect it too.
When you accomplish something or some event is finally realized, some may not feel the sense of satisfaction or relief that most would feel. I daresay, i'm one of them. It makes me feel normal, like nothing big has taken place to be proud of, until someone says good job, great show and hell yea!
I guess, in all honesty, the sense you get after a show is, "okay, so now it's over." followed by a flat "yay". Not enthusiastic and not hysterical, but just a simple just, if that makes any sense at all.
For me the simplest of meeting a friend, family and just hanging out having coffee, evjoying a movie, just chilling, or even hearing a song that reflects ur mood at the current moment, is a sense of satisfaction. I guess, we can say our lives are like, the 'Sims', we need social activity to keep us mentally satisfied.
The changes this year are slightly significant, being a stronger and more confident, is satisfying. However, there is still some issues, to be worked on, like telling a friend I don't the conversation or even saying could you please not talk about this anymore. Oh well, no one is perfect and carefree all the time are they.
Peace Out
When you accomplish something or some event is finally realized, some may not feel the sense of satisfaction or relief that most would feel. I daresay, i'm one of them. It makes me feel normal, like nothing big has taken place to be proud of, until someone says good job, great show and hell yea!
I guess, in all honesty, the sense you get after a show is, "okay, so now it's over." followed by a flat "yay". Not enthusiastic and not hysterical, but just a simple just, if that makes any sense at all.
For me the simplest of meeting a friend, family and just hanging out having coffee, evjoying a movie, just chilling, or even hearing a song that reflects ur mood at the current moment, is a sense of satisfaction. I guess, we can say our lives are like, the 'Sims', we need social activity to keep us mentally satisfied.
The changes this year are slightly significant, being a stronger and more confident, is satisfying. However, there is still some issues, to be worked on, like telling a friend I don't the conversation or even saying could you please not talk about this anymore. Oh well, no one is perfect and carefree all the time are they.
Peace Out
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Weekday 050209 - 1.19am
Yay I'm so gonna stone at work tom, like I do always haha. So it's 1.13am and I'm done with my friend's montage. Was real fun to do..reminds you of old memories....good times of course.
So I think I had a stressful yet fun day today. I never though staying back at work and finishing off minutes could be a huge relief! It's like I'm growing into work and that is a scary feeling. I have my good friends to thank for, they keep me where I always am, so my creative juices are still kept flowing.
My colleague and friend, another piggy, is just the ultimate cutest thing I have ever seen. She totally made our going home an unforgettable moment, with her slipping slippers hehe. Good fun!
Prods still in my head and will never be erased. My whiplash is getting worse and my body is hurting, but i'm still awake, craziness right!? tell me about it haha.
Peace and Love
So I think I had a stressful yet fun day today. I never though staying back at work and finishing off minutes could be a huge relief! It's like I'm growing into work and that is a scary feeling. I have my good friends to thank for, they keep me where I always am, so my creative juices are still kept flowing.
My colleague and friend, another piggy, is just the ultimate cutest thing I have ever seen. She totally made our going home an unforgettable moment, with her slipping slippers hehe. Good fun!
Prods still in my head and will never be erased. My whiplash is getting worse and my body is hurting, but i'm still awake, craziness right!? tell me about it haha.
Peace and Love
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Weekday 040209
Wow, the 4 already. Time sure flies, not complaning though, just tat the time could go faster when at work hehe.
So yea, I went for Prodigy yesterday, it was exhilarating, but we had to wait 3 hours B4 their Big come out! Crowd was awesome...hell yea Prodigy fans! Everyone was jumping, singing, raising their hands, shouting, screaming, was just fantastic! Managed to sneak a few potos, but only for my eyes only.
Am at work at the moment, having a headache, whiplash and definitely aching legs haha but it was worth it. It's a long day and night today, all the best to me!
Stoning Out.....
Peaece....
So yea, I went for Prodigy yesterday, it was exhilarating, but we had to wait 3 hours B4 their Big come out! Crowd was awesome...hell yea Prodigy fans! Everyone was jumping, singing, raising their hands, shouting, screaming, was just fantastic! Managed to sneak a few potos, but only for my eyes only.
Am at work at the moment, having a headache, whiplash and definitely aching legs haha but it was worth it. It's a long day and night today, all the best to me!
Stoning Out.....
Peaece....
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Weekend 010209
Yes, another Saturday.
I just got home from a movie, Bride Wars. It amazing how relationships mean so much. I was in the taxi coming home and a mixed satisfaction plus jealousy feeling came to me. Weird feeling, I tell ya.
My friends are all getting married, it's so funny how so many weddings can just pop out in a year and before you know it, you're the only single one that's left! It makes everything so intimidating and scary, especially when you don't even have a boyfriend yet! Makes you think... is it me!?
I'm 26 this June, and I have for some reason become more aware, confident and a little different than before. People have noticed the change, but I still think I'm the same. Yes, I have changed my wardrobe, like alot, but I think personality, character and attitude counts much more. I have learned from the previous years the dos and don'ts and I think I am proud to say, I am defined. I guess that mood will come and it dosen't go away till a pin bursts that bubble.
I liked a certain someone, and even told them, but there was no reaction and found out that they liked another. I was disappointed and then realised that the type of girl that that certain someone was looking out for was typical. I let them go, and I think from that moment on, the attitude changed. I got hold of 'Kevin Rudolf's - Let It Rock!' song and man, that song is attitude with a capital A! I kept it on loop and hell yea it sorta changed my perspective of where I stand. From then on I glowed!
I lost weight, defintely and I must say that is the ultimate confidence booster. I've seen the reality shows and adverts where people say "I feel more confident", I didn't believe or trust them, but hey my tongue's tied now!
Things aren't perfect it never is, last year I was a lost and finding my way through the thick and thin of the ice. In 09 I think I kinda made it halfway across without falling through. Am still getting there, wish me luck!
I just got home from a movie, Bride Wars. It amazing how relationships mean so much. I was in the taxi coming home and a mixed satisfaction plus jealousy feeling came to me. Weird feeling, I tell ya.
My friends are all getting married, it's so funny how so many weddings can just pop out in a year and before you know it, you're the only single one that's left! It makes everything so intimidating and scary, especially when you don't even have a boyfriend yet! Makes you think... is it me!?
I'm 26 this June, and I have for some reason become more aware, confident and a little different than before. People have noticed the change, but I still think I'm the same. Yes, I have changed my wardrobe, like alot, but I think personality, character and attitude counts much more. I have learned from the previous years the dos and don'ts and I think I am proud to say, I am defined. I guess that mood will come and it dosen't go away till a pin bursts that bubble.
I liked a certain someone, and even told them, but there was no reaction and found out that they liked another. I was disappointed and then realised that the type of girl that that certain someone was looking out for was typical. I let them go, and I think from that moment on, the attitude changed. I got hold of 'Kevin Rudolf's - Let It Rock!' song and man, that song is attitude with a capital A! I kept it on loop and hell yea it sorta changed my perspective of where I stand. From then on I glowed!
I lost weight, defintely and I must say that is the ultimate confidence booster. I've seen the reality shows and adverts where people say "I feel more confident", I didn't believe or trust them, but hey my tongue's tied now!
Things aren't perfect it never is, last year I was a lost and finding my way through the thick and thin of the ice. In 09 I think I kinda made it halfway across without falling through. Am still getting there, wish me luck!
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